My dearest friends,

I simply must share a little joy that found its way to me over coffee — quite literally! I came across the most charming espresso set recently, and it sparked such a delightful discussion that I felt compelled to write to you all, as if we were gathered in my garden room with the sun gently warming the china and laughter bubbling over petit fours.

This exquisite set featured a petite, porcelain demitasse — with a lid, no less! Instantly, it reminded me of those enchanting Turkish coffee cups. Do you recall how they’re traditionally served with lids to keep the coffee warm while also capturing the rich aroma? The lid isn't just functional; it turns sipping your coffee into a mini ceremony. There’s something about lifting that lid — like unwrapping a present — that elevates the moment into something quite special. And, as a lovely bonus, it preserves that golden layer of crema we all adore on our espresso.

But what truly caught my eye was the double saucer. Yes, two! The inner saucer, slightly raised like a little stage, cradles the cup perfectly — no risk of a wobbly spill. The outer saucer? Oh, it’s genius! It offers just enough space for a dainty biscuit, a sugar cube, or even your spoon (which in this case was rather generously sized — clearly not designed to balance on a tiny edge). It reminds me so much of the trembleuse cups of the 18th century — do you remember those? They were made precisely to avoid shaky spills, especially for those with delicate hands.

What I particularly love is how this design marries thoughtful utility with elegance. It invites you to slow down and savour the moment — perhaps with a book or while writing a letter (like this one!). And did you know that certain high-end sets — like the ones from Feldspar Studio in Devon — are made just like this? Handcrafted, lidded porcelain, and perfect for a double shot at 90 ml. Such sophistication!

There’s also a sweet cultural nod tucked in here: these lidded cups and ornate saucers are reminiscent of Ottoman traditions, where presentation was an art form and every detail mattered. It’s as if the set whispers stories of old-world rituals with every sip.

So next time you're served espresso with a lid and a double saucer, take a moment to enjoy the beauty of it — the warmth, the aroma, the thoughtful design. It's more than just a cup of coffee, my loves. It's a little celebration in porcelain.

With warmest affection (and perhaps another espresso…),

Lady Arabella

A white porcelain coffee cup and saucer, from a cafe or restaurant in Emilia-Romagna, Italy. The cup features a golden emblem with the text al Vedel and dal 1700, suggesting a long-standing establishment or a brand with historical roots.

Letters from readers

I would love it if you could address the word "casual" in dress codes in a future post. I live in the United States and once attended a fundraiser in Toronto where the dress code was "casual chic" - I wore a floral purple shiny tunic over black jeans with leather boots, which would work in the U.S., but when I showed up at the event, everyone was dressed to the nines. I didn't stay long, and was very upset because I travelled and paid nearly $400 for the event ticket. When you said "smart-casual" in your post below, I truly have no idea what that means. And what it means under different contexts and in different locations. Would love to hear more in a future post. Thanks, Cindy

Dear Cindy

Thank you for writing and for sharing your story. You were not at fault. The term is quite confusing, I do admit.

Here is a clear guide you can keep.

What “casual” means
Casual is relaxed and comfortable, but still neat.
Plain T-shirts or knits, denim, summer dresses, simple skirts, clean trainers or flats.
Logos, distressed denim and beachwear belong at home.

What “casual chic” means
Casual with one or two polished elements.
Think denim with a silk blouse and heeled boots. A simple midi dress with a blazer. A fine knit with tailored trousers and loafers.
At evening fundraisers, many hosts use this term but expect cocktail attire. Treat “casual chic” at a charity event as at least smart casual, often cocktail.

What “smart casual” means
Polished separates with structure. No suit required, but pieces look tailored.
Jersey and denim are possible by day. For evening in hotels, clubs and museums, choose trousers or a skirt over jeans.
Shoes are refined: loafers, pumps, ankle boots. Avoid athletic trainers and flip-flops.

Outfit formulas you can trust

Women, daytime
Blazer or structured cardigan
Silk blouse or fine knit
Tailored trousers or dark, non-distressed jeans
Loafers, ballet flats or ankle boots
Add a belt and simple jewellery

Women, evening
Midi dress or blouse with skirt
Blazer or wrap
Heels or elegant flats
Small structured bag

Men, daytime
Navy blazer
Collared shirt or fine-gauge knit polo
Chinos or pressed dark jeans
Leather loafers or derbies
Belt to match shoes

Men, evening
Jacket in navy or charcoal
Crisp shirt
Tailored trousers
Oxfords or derbies
Pocket square optional

How to read an invitation in 30 seconds
What is the venue
Hotel, private club, museum and theatre usually raise the level.
What is the time of day
Evening always reads smarter than daytime.
What is the host’s world
Luxury, finance, arts patrons and diplomatic circles dress more formally.
What is the ticket price
Higher prices often signal a cocktail as the baseline.
What will you be doing
Seated dinner is dressier than a daytime reception.

Regional nuances
United States: Smart casual often includes dark denim, especially by day or on the West Coast. Trainers can appear minimal and pristine.
Canada and the UK: smart casual skews more tailored, especially in private clubs and five-star hotels. Denim and trainers are frequently discouraged in the evening.
If the invitation mentions a private members’ club, assume no jeans and no trainers unless stated.

Quick reference

Casual
Neat knit or tee, jeans or casual skirt, clean trainers or flats.

Casual chic
As above, with one elevated piece such as a blazer, silk blouse or heeled boot.

Smart casual
Tailored jacket or refined knit, trousers or a skirt, leather shoes. Dark denim only if clearly acceptable and never distressed.

Business casual
Shirt or blouse with blazer, tailored trousers or skirt, closed-toe shoes. No denim.

Cocktail
Dress, dressy separates or jacket with trousers. Heels or polished flats. For men, a dark jacket, trousers, a shirt and leather shoes. Tie optional unless stated.

When in doubt
Ask the organiser one precise question: “Are dark jeans and smart trainers acceptable, or would you prefer trousers and leather shoes?”
Check the venue's dress code online.
Choose the smarter option. You will never feel out of place for being a touch more polished.

Common pitfalls to avoid
Athleisure, logo tees, distressed denim, beach sandals, overly casual leather boots, and backpacks at evening events.

Two safe fallbacks anywhere

Women
Blazer, silk blouse, tailored trousers, pumps or elegant flats.

Men
Navy blazer, light shirt, mid-grey trousers, leather shoes.

A final thought

Before you leave, ask yourself three questions.

Would this look appropriate in a hotel lobby in the evening?
Could I remove the jacket and still look pulled together?
Do my shoes and bag look deliberately chosen?

If you would like, send me the wording of your next invitation, the venue and the time of day. I will translate it for you.

I look forward to hearing from you, and I value your feedback and questions.

Have a wonderful weekend.

With warmest wishes,

Lady Arabella
Leading Patron for The British School of Excellence