You might have noticed a recent shift in the name of our upcoming We the Experts Adoptee Speaker Series panel. Initially, it was titled “Perceived Same Race Black Adoptees.” However, a conversation with one of our panelists, Sandi, led me to reflect on how the term “perceived” landed with her and likely others. As someone who is an adoptee but not a Black adoptee myself, I leaned into deep listening.
I am sharing this with you because this moment connects to something much larger about our community. Many of us were raised in adoptee isolation, often without seeing what it looks like for adoptees to have honest, sometimes difficult conversations with one another about adoption, race, or identity. As children, adoptees have not always had space to disagree, to question, or to feel truly heard about our experiences with adoption. That history of being unheard means that when we do speak, it can feel vulnerable, and sometimes even come across as angry or too strong, even when what is underneath is a deep desire to be understood.
What mattered most to me in my conversation with Sandi was not simply changing a title. It was the way two adoptees came together, trusted one another, held the benefit of the doubt, and stayed in a hard conversation long enough to truly listen. In that process, both of us felt heard, and the decision to change the title made sense because it grew out of that connection.
Moments like this are why Adoption Mosaic exists. We are not a monolith, and we do not have to think alike to be in community. We strive to create spaces where adoptees can show up as they are, speak honestly, and learn from one another, even when the topics are complex.
I invite you to join us for our upcoming We the Experts panel, Black Adoptees and the Complexities of Same Race Adoption, where these kinds of thoughtful, nuanced conversations will continue.
