BROADWAY CHRIS IS IN THE BUILDING!!!

Who needs Joe and his pantyhose when I have his cool fur coat, a Lenny D Pall Mall, and the Jets are about to come a-callin. I know they won their first game since 1971, but week 2 is normally when it all falls apart. "But wait", I say. "I have over 50 years of eligibility left. Put me in, Coach!" This time they will--purely as a publicity stunt. The same way we all tuned in to see Evel Knievel crash into a line of buses, so will America tune in to watch me break a rib or two. I was done using that femur bone anyways.

Now who's ready for Week Dos picks??? That is all the Spanish I know but I am trying to let our international readers know they are welcome to lose money with me any time!

Here is some stuff I like and hope you like too...

AS ALWAYS, REPLY TO THIS EMAIL WITH YOUR THOUGHTS AND COMMENTS AND STUFF YOU WANT TO SEE! I FEEDBACK IS ALWAYS APPRECIATED!

CHRIS THE COACH

I thought I should provide a quick View From the Coach on last week's happenings. While not a football coach, I do coach a standup comedy writing class on Saturday mornings, so I feel that gives me a unique insight into what NFL coaches are probably thinking right about now. Here are my insights:

Sean Payton is calling Drew Brees in a desperate panic and asking him to pull a Phillip Rivers from 2026 Indy.
Sean McVay is setting his alarm clock extra early so the team isn't too bushed from their long trip to SoFi.
And the classiest man in the business--the Ghost of Tom Landry's Fedora-- is rolling over in its garment bag right about now. It's gonna be a long season Cowboys!😀😀😀

THE PICKS!!!!!

LAST WEEK'S RECORD: 10 - 6

THIS SEASON'S RECORD: 10 - 6

**I BELIEVE I HAVE OFFICIALLY WON MORE GAMES THAN I DID ALL OF LAST SEASON!

WEEK 1

LIONS AT BILLS

No one wants to go to Buffalo ever. I fully expect it to snow on their first home game in their dumpster fire of a new stadium. Hallmark should make a movie about that. The only place worse than going to Buffalo is going to Detroit. The Lions will feel like they are kings for a day getting to leave the Motor City for a weekend, and they take full advantage, whooping up on the Bills. Lions win by 10.

PICK: LIONS

SAINTS AT RAVENS

For all of us who were almost fooled by week 1 Saints, week 2 provides no such miracles. Ravens will play smooth jazz all over the Saints defense, and NO's offense will be victims of voodoo. Not even close this time.

PICK: RAVENS

PACKERS AT JETS

I will bet $100 right now that Brett Favre unretires to play for both teams. The Ol' Gunslinger gets in one last jab at his (really) old team, and the Jets keep on their miraculous one-game winning streak by adding a second.

PICK: JETS

VIKINGS AT BEARS

My friend Denise is a huge Vikings fan. And if you know anything about me, you know that I passionately dislike Chicago. So sign me up for the resurgence of Wentz, and let's see the Vikings take a commanding league in the most painful to watch division in football.

PICK: VIKINGS

STEELERS AT PATRIOTS

Aaron Rodgers was the first person to be nicknamed "Crazy Legs" all the way back in 1933. The reason was simple-- his legs actually were certified crazy. Of course it was by Joseph Kennedy, father of the lobotomized Rose, so who knows? All I can say is that he's crazy enough to snatch a victory away from the Patriots despite only throwing for 9 yards.

PICK: STEELERS

BENGALS AT TEXANS

Last week, the Texans almost beat the Bills. This week, they almost beat the Bengals. Such will be the season for the almost good Houston Texans. Joe Burrow gets another unfamiliar September win, while dressing as a chic bag lady going to and from the game.

PICK: BENGALS

EAGLES AT TITANS

There will be howls of agony coming from the bi-focaled tomb of Ben Frankin this week as the Titans take the Eagles to the woodshed. Hurts lives up to his name, and Cam Ward acts like a Ward Boss in a 1930's gangster film, taking whatever he wants.

PICK: TITANS

BROWNS AT BUCS

Every pass Baker Mayfield completes will be worth roughy $38 million dollars. He got the Bucs to pony up a bag of Monopoly cash, but it won't be enough to buy wins. Deshaun Watson will be lured away to Massage Envy mid-game, and Sanders will snag the victory and the future starting job for Cleveland.

PICK: BROWNS

PANTHERS AT FALCONS

I'm sorry--who are these teams again??? Tony Gonzalez catches 9 TDs from Matt Ryan, and the Falcons resign Michael Vick. Blah blah blah. I probably won't even watch the highlights.

PICK: TIE

JAGUARS AT BRONCOS

I struggle with thinking of the Jaguars as a good team. I liked them better with Blaine Gabbert. Anyways, they will further expose the pile of ineptitude that will be the 2026 Broncos.

PICK: JAGUARS

RAIDERS AT CHARGERS

Pop's Pick of the Week is a slam dunk. Chargers will wallop the Raiders, forcing Kirk Cousins to to sing hymns of penance and mercy by halftime. Herbert will make SoFi proud to be the weird little bank that they are.

PICK: CHARGERS

COMMANDERS AT COWBOYS

Daniels could be my favorite non-Mahomes QB in the league. He just always looks happy playing. He is going to be the greatest spokesperson in NFL history. Better than Sleep Number counting Dak Prescott, who will be able to count his TDs in this game with zero fingers.

PICK: COMMANDERS

DOLPHINS AT 49ERS

Ummmmm...can they just call this off already??? This is why the NFL should have a mercy rule. This is going to be ugly fast. Enough said.

PICK: 49ERS

COLTS AT CHIEFS

CHIEFS!!!! What a week 1. In true Chiefs fashion, they will run the ball zero times in week 2 and almost lose. Fortunately, Indy seems terrible, and Daniel Jones' career resurgence stops now.

PICK: CHIEFS

GIANTS AT RAMS

Giants had a great week 1. Rams overslept apparently because they didn't know where Australia was. But that was all last week. This week will be a different story, as the Rams return to the form we expect, Dart's evil 80's ways will not be enough.

PICK: RAMS

MY SPOTIFY PLAYLIST OF THE WEEK...

CO2ISFUNNY | Songs About Twos, Doubles & Twins...

Week 2 is one of my favorite weeks in football. Week 1 has too many miscues-- everyone is amped up and bananas. Week 2, you figure out who you are gonna be. 1-1 is survivable. 0-2 is almost insurmountable. That's why this week's playlist celebrates twos, doubles and twins--all things twos!

Here are 10 great songs about doubling your fun:

Two of Us | The Beatles

Evil Twin | Arctic Monkeys

The Deverell Twins | Black Box Recorder

Me and My Shadow | The Only Ones

Two | The Antlers

Double Life | Conor Oberst

Table For Two | Milky Chance

You and Me Song | The Wannadies

You and Me | Penny and the Quarters

You and Me | Lara Taska

CLICK THE IMAGE FOR THE SPOTIFY PLAYLIST

THE SHOW I AM WATCHING

Here is a vintage gem! America's angriest nice dad Fred MacMurray, who always looks like he's getting ready to spank his kids but out of love, plays a college football coach who's team can't win a game. At home things are no better. His eldest daughter Connie is growing up fast! Through the kind of hijinks that can only happen in the 1940s, just as Coach is getting ready to get canned, his suddenly popular daughter convinces a star football player to attend the college, and all works out. Sorry about the spoiler--that's like ruining 6th Sense...

The most interesting parts of the movie are Maureen O'Hara, just off of a brilliant turn in Miracle on 34th Street, and Natalie Wood, pre-celebrity, as the youngest daughter.

Worth a watch if you like 40s screwball comedies...which I o!

SUSAN WARE CLIP OF THE WEEK

Few people know about the pre-cursor to It's A Wonderful Life which Susan starred in around 1927. The movie, directed by Frank Capra's 3rd cousin Larry Capra, was called You're Life is Meh, and it starred Susan as the incredibly incompetent manager of the Bailey Savings & Loan. When $100,000 goes missing unexpectedly, the town is pissed! Susan decides to kill herself by jumping off a bridge. All of the townspeople in Bedhead Falls pray for her demise. They summon an angel to ensure that she actually drowns and can never return. The amount of bell ringing would have been unbearable if the movie hadn't been silent. After she jumps, the angel Cool Clarence shows the town how much better life would have been without her the entire time. Turns out, everyone would have been rich and happy if she could have just managed basic finances. In the final scene, the townspeople ransack what remains of Susan's old home, and steal her possessions to pawn. It's a little bit of a downer. Not the classic we know and love today, but a minor hit for SOB Pictures nonetheless.

Anyways, check out Susan by clicking HERE.

I hope you enjoy these as well! Feel free to subscribe if you want. I will also include them here, but the posts that come from her site are hilarious and go out on Mondays and Thursdays!

SUSANWARECOMEDY.COM

HERE'S A RECIPE

Many people think I am of Irish descent. That is true...except for when it comes to my frozen foods. Then I am full on, authentic Italian, proudly serving recipes from the Old Country. This is one of my absolute favorites: frozen Totinos pizza rolls

Put pizza rolls on pan

Put in oven

Heat them until the sauce busts out of them and is ready to scald your mouth

This is a true gameday favorite, just like Grandpa Francisio used to make, although his packages of pizza rolls were typically expired for a minimum of three years.

CLIP OF THE WEEK

Closing the loop on Fred MacMurray!

CLICK THE IMAGE FOR THE VIDEO.

As always, you can check out my clips on the site (co2isfunny.com) or YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/@co2isfunny).

FORWARD TO A FRIEND, ETC

Please do me a favor and forward to a. friend. You get no prize other than my undying gratitude (and maybe a free ticket to a show when I am in your area if you let me know!).

I am very grateful to each and every one of you for your support and follows and likes, etc. You all are the best!

See you next week!

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