WE ARE BACK, BABY!!!!

I was beginning to think we would never see the day! I assumed if there was ever to be an armageddon, with my luck, it would come on September 8th! Alas, the world had other plans, and we are back in business! For those of you who don't know the origins of this weekly rag, it all started shilling burgers for the man in NoCal. I was doing marketing for a restaurant franchise up near SF, and I started a weekly newsletter where the goal was to never mention the food except the weekend special. Even that was an afterthought. It was all about my prognostication for all things gridiron! (How on earth did I get fired????) After putting together an impressive season where I correctly guessed maybe three games all season long, we are back at it! If you want to get rich via sports betting, this is not the place for you. But if you have extra money sitting around you do not need at all, then great! Welcome to Some Stuff Weekly! 😀😀😀

Before we begin... a few actual welcomes!...

At long last my eldest sister Maureen joins us from St. Louis! I have no idea who guilted her into joining after only a year, but I have a feeling in coincided with my sister Kat's visit over the holiday! For her punishment, Moey is going to have to read every back edition including listening to the sometimes brutal Spotify playlists! She is a lawyer, so I have to watch my words carefully as she is not above filing a federal case against me! :)
The other notable new signup was my aunt Mary Beth! Mary Beth was the coolest aunt I had growing up because she smoked and had an Opel car, both of which were awesome! She was also the closest to us in age and let us get away with a lot of great stuff! Later, she hired me for summer jobs, which must have cost her thousands of dollars in repairs because I never knew what I was doing. I think I painted more of her windows permanently shut than I can count.

Welcome to you both, and what a perfect week to join!

Here is some stuff I like and hope you like too...

AS ALWAYS, REPLY TO THIS EMAIL WITH YOUR THOUGHTS AND COMMENTS AND STUFF YOU WANT TO SEE! I FEEDBACK IS ALWAYS APPRECIATED!

CHRIS THE KANSAN

While not as famous as Jimmy the Greek, I also make amazing guesses about football games. I, too, was an unhappy, grumpy man who was almost never right when talking about sports, and even less right when talking about ethnicity. For years, people begged me to be Greek-- just drink some ouzo and eat some grape leaves people would say, but I refused. I'm from Wichita, damnit. That's Pizza Hut country. Hence the tremendous amount of weight I gained just prior to this picture being taken. Now, let's lose some money, shall we??? 😀😀😀

THE PICKS!!!!!

WEEK 1

49ERS VS RAMS

My pick of the week! This is the game to start with! They played two of the best games of the season last year, snd this one will be just as good. Brock Purdy will lead his Boy Scout troop from Northern Iowa into Skid Row and get mugged and ransacked like all midwesterners do. LA wins this one by 10!

PICK: RAMS

PATRIOTS @ SEAHAWKS

**Written before the actual game because I didn't know when it was!!!

Here is a lesson on how to start a season on the most boring note possible. Following the least interesting Super Bowl of all time, the NFL offers a repeat to kick off 2026. Meh. Patriots win this one easy. The Darnold era is done.

PICK: PATRIOTS

BUCS @ BENGALS

My brother Matt is pretending he's a Tampa fan now that he has moved to the land of mosquitoes and gun racks. That won't be enough to cheer on Baker and the Boys to a victory. Joe Burrow finally gets the Bengals off to the elusive hot start they usually avoid.

PICK: BENGALS

SAINTS @ DETROIT

Let's all pretend we still like the Saints because of Katrina just one more time! They go into Detroit like an Edsel in a demolition derby and take care of business against a Lions team who returns to inventing novel ways to lose.

PICK: SAINTS

JETS @ TITANS

The winner of this game is 2028! No one cares! The TV market for this game is going to be 3 prisons in the Adirondacks. Someone has to win, so let's just say Tennessee.

PICK: TITANS

COLTS @ RAVENS

Which team likes Baltimore least? The old Colts or the new Ravens, who have been mistreating their fans for a decade. Now that they are Harbaugh-less, maybe Lamar can get them over the hump. Today they see the ghost of Ray Lewis.

PICK: RAVENS

FALCONS @ STEELERS

The sleepy dog finds a bone. The Steelers, led by Steeler QB Legend Bill Dudley as channeled by Aaron Rodgers, pull one out due to the sheer ineptitude of the Falcons.

PICK: STEELERS

BEARS @ PANTHERS

The Bears narrowly escape a very seasonal September blizzard trying to leave their frigid city where the sun never shines, as they travel to Carolina (which is not a place btw...) and defeat the Panthers because they are so overjoyed just to see light.

PICK: BEARS

BROWNS @ JAGUARS

Deshaun Watson is delighted to be in Jacksonville--America's home of the questionable massage. This burst of enthusiasm inspires him to play the game of his life, and the Browns fans eat crow yet again.

PICK: BROWNS

BILLS @ TEXANS

Please, please, please God-- i need to you to answer this life and death prayer about football even though it is only week 1...Please let the Bills lose!!! What's that? Not a chance...you have money on the game...? OK. Never mind. Josh Allen cruises.

PICK: BILLS

RAIDERS @ DOLPHINS

Kirk Cousins is able to throw three touchdown passes and also invent four new family-friendly barbershop quartet tunes all before halftime. The Dolphins launch a deep pass for ~~Tyreek~~...interception. Cousins teaches the Dolphins some Sunday school.

PICK: RAIDERS

PACKERS @ VIKINGS

Why does the NFC North even exist as a conference? I thought they stopped playing when the forward pass was invented. Here is a game for the ages in the rust belt. Two cities enjoying their one non-snow game.

PICK: VIKINGS

COMMANDERS @ EAGLES

Let the unbearable noise that is Eagles fans end early this year. Jayden Daniels returns to his rookie year glory and goes Clubber Lang on the Eagles. Build a statue to that fake person, Philly! Commanders are gonna cruise.

PICK: COMMANDERS

CARDINALS @ CHARGERS

When you see the PP, you know it is Pop's Pick of the Week, in honor of my buddy Mike's Pops. This one is a no-brainer. Any team that was once in St. Louis will always struggle to win, right Cardinals? Chargers, also battling the displacement blues, remember they are no longer in SD long enough to wake up and crush the Cards.

PICK: CHARGERS

COWBOYS @ GIANTS

Now that Skate-BOOOOO has pissed off everyone on his own team, it's time for the Cowboys to detest him as well. The Giants version of Sophie Cunningham backflips his way into a Martin Gramatica-style injury and is never heard from again. Unfortunately, perma-80's villian Jaxson Dart pulls out his $2 and wins the game on accident.

PICK: GIANTS

BRONCOS @ CHIEFS

Don't even start with me. This isn't going to be a game. Chiefs by 40.

PICK: CHIEFS

MY SPOTIFY PLAYLIST OF THE WEEK...

CO2ISFUNNY | Songs About Taking This Job & Shoving It...

I get it. We all get excited when our teams do well. Sometimes, though, it's a lot. Sometimes we go just a touch overboard in our "fandom" and it borders on scary.

Here are 10 warning songs about why we should sometimes care less:

I Will Possess Your Heart | Deathcab for Cutie

#1 Crush | Garbage

Mr. Brightside | The Killers

I Want the One I Can't Have | The Smiths

Creep | Radiohead

Desire | Meg Myers

Ava Adore | Smashing Pumpkins

Tyler | The Toadies

The More You Ignore Me, the Closer I Get | Morrissey

Every Breath You Take | Police

CLICK THE IMAGE FOR THE SPOTIFY PLAYLIST

THE SHOW I AM WATCHING

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's an obvious pick and I mentioned it once before. I don't care. It's time for the annual viewing. Jamie Foxx is Steamin' Willie Beamon in this movie about watching Dennis Quaid get somehow still older but yet be able to play sports. When will it end??? He is 79 years old and still playing for Miami???

I love this movie for all of it's absurdity. I first saw it while living in Florida, which felt so insanely appropriate. The amount of redneck debauchery that takes place in this film feels like it happens just outside of Tallahassee. Plus I love movies where Al Pacino yells at everyone for no reason in particular--wait, that's every movie.

Just knock it out. You know you have to see it at least once between now and February.

SUSAN WARE CLIP OF THE WEEK

While on the set of the silent football classic That's Not Pigskin. That's My Real Skin (the producers wanted both a frothy, lighthearted football comedy and also a damning expose of child factory working conditions), Susan was mistaken for a college student, and accidentally became enrolled in a world geography class. Unfortunately it was in the immediate aftermath of World War I, and there wasn't a single accurate map in the entire world (wait, that's not the Ottoman Empire anymore??? What is a Turkey???). Susan was just thrilled someone thought she was smart as that had never happened before, but then when the professor received her first paper, which she wrote on the inside of cigarette packs, it was discovered she was a fraud, and she was expelled from the school she never enrolled in. No matter. Schoolin' wasn't in the cards anyways, but mediocre B-grade silent movies were.

Anyways, check out Susan by clicking HERE.

I hope you enjoy these as well! Feel free to subscribe if you want. I will also include them here, but the posts that come from her site are hilarious and go out on Mondays and Thursdays!

SUSANWARECOMEDY.COM

HERE'S A RECIPE

A sports fan's classic. This is sure to win the hearts and stomachs of fanatics at every game.

Put chips on plate

Put Velveeta on top

Microwave the crap out of it

You can't go wrong. Store brand everything will work just fine. No one will know the difference. And don't forget the golden rule-- if it even looks like a veggie, it's gotta go!

CLIP OF THE WEEK

Here we go football season!!!!!

CLICK THE IMAGE FOR THE VIDEO.

As always, you can check out my clips on the site (co2isfunny.com) or YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/@co2isfunny).

FORWARD TO A FRIEND, ETC

Please do me a favor and forward to a. friend. You get no prize other than my undying gratitude (and maybe a free ticket to a show when I am in your area if you let me know!).

I am very grateful to each and every one of you for your support and follows and likes, etc. You all are the best!

See you next week!

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