MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

I hope everyone is happy, healthy and celebrating with friends and loved ones. I know I am! This holiday season has been one of the best...

Here is some stuff I like and hope you like too...

AS ALWAYS, REPLY TO THIS EMAIL WITH YOUR THOUGHTS AND COMMENTS AND STUFF YOU WANT TO SEE! I FEEDBACK IS ALWAYS APPRECIATED!

NFL WEEK 16

I am in Kansas City, and I cannot tell you how nervous I am for my ACL. QBs around here dropping like flies! If the Chiefs need me for the Christmas Day game, I am ready! My jersey says Len Dawson on it cuz Lenny the Cool and I have a lot in common--mainly our halftime routine.

Let's get to the picks!

• THU | COWBOYS @ COMMANDERS | PICK: COMMANDERS

  • Cowboys lose another one for the Gipper. Not sure if those team references make sense, but I am pretty sure about the Cowboys loss. At some point the Gipper is going to have to win one for himself.

• THU | LIONS @ VIKINGS | PICK: LIONS

  • Lions must win. This normally would make me pick a loss. But I believe...in Detroit. Did I just write those words??? Is this a Motown album review??? How am I upbeat about Lions football???

• THU | BRONCOS @ CHIEFS | PICK: CHIEFS

  • The egg nog is kicking in. Not enough to kill the pain of this season, but enough to allow me to confidently make the worst pick of the entire year.

• SAT | TEXANS @ CHARGERS | PICK: CHARGERS

  • These games are getting legit! Chargers do not lose this game. Is Harbaugh eyeing the open Michigan head coaching job??? There are only 8,491 rules violations standing in his way.

• SAT | RAVENS @ PACKERS | PICK: RAVENS

  • The ghost of Edgar Allen Poe is lactose intolerant. That means bad things for the Packers. Those crazy black birds will pick the Cheeseheads apart faster than you can say Tippi Hedren.

• SUN | BUCS @ DOLPHINS | PICK: BUCS

  • The Battle of Florida has all of the appeal of an all-inclusive in Tallahassee. Just a bunch of campers who ran out of gas and moonshine before reaching the NASCAR track.I love Baker and the Bucs. They have not loved me back but its Christmas. Maybe the gift of Tua's turnovers will be just enough!

• SUN | PATRIOTS @ JETS | PICK: PATRIOTS

  • This is the oddest juxtaposition of mascots in this week's games. Neither is particularly frightening. Patriots are just old people in wigs with old-timey muskets. Don't try to tell me I'm wrong. I watched Ken Burns on PBS. Jets??? Have you flown Southwest? That is scarier than this team. Patriots win.

• SUN | STEELERS @ BROWNS | PICK: BROWNS

  • Otto Graham takes on his mentor, wily veteran Aaron Rodgers. Using the Box Formation and the newly developed forward pass, the Browns and an incredibly angry Otto Graham do a fierce battle. Unfortunately, the problem with the forward pass is the game has not yet invented the receiver, so catching will be non-existent. Every pass falls harmlessly to the dirt. Browns do the most Browns thing ever and pluck defeat from the jaws of victory. Steelers 2-0.

• SUN | JAGUARS @ COLTS | PICK: COLTS

  • Phillip Rivers, fresh from a visit to Branson where all the kids go, is rested and ready to take on Trevor Lawrence. Inspired by Andy Williams, Phillip Moon Rivers croons the Colts to a victory that would have been way more exciting last week when people cared. The Colts are still a few Werther's Originals away from contending.

• SUN | SAINTS @ TITANS | PICK: SAINTS

  • Is it Mardi Gras yet? Most of this past year has felt like Lent. Punishment and penance. Inexplicably not eating meat on Fridays...or at least at a TGI Fridays. Saints need some celebrating to carry them into the high holy season. The Titans will just write a whiskey-soaked ballad about the whole thing and a dog, and the world will be back in its proper order.

• SUN | SEAHAWKS @ PANTHERS | PICK: SEAHAWKS

  • I keep waiting for the Seahawks to start their Year of Living Darnoldy. Darnold is an Olde English word that means, "Huh?" As in, "What did he just do? Why did he just do that?" He is the Mr. Darcy of your local mall's Foot Locker. You think you are buying Nikes but that swoosh is an imposter whale Granimal. He will sneak through another game or two before it all implodes.

• SUN | CARDINALS @ BENGALS | PICK: BENGALS

  • The best part about Cincinnati is Kentucky. That is where the airport is, and that means you are leaving town. Not much to see. Even less to like. Skyline is a dump--that's not chili, it is just disgusting spaghetti...but it is good enough to crush the Cardinals!!!

• SUN | EAGLES @ BILLS | PICK: BILLS

  • Every time I see Josh Allen off the field, I love that guy even more. I am so glad the NFL has another Brady-Manning rivalry between him and Mahomes. Makes the game better for everyone. The AFC will come down to the Bills and the Chargers. I think it will go to the Bills this time, but I am always incredibly inaccurate. Buffalo is just the Wichita of New York. That's not saying a lot.

• SUN | GIANTS @ RAIDERS | PICK: RAIDERS

  • Jaxson Dart fills your Days of Thunder with some good ol' Russ Wheeler cheating. Hopefully we can channel our inner Tom Cruise Cole Trickle and teach this young punk a lesson or two. I'm looking at you Maxx Crosby!

• SUN | BEARS @ 49ERS | PICK: 49ERS

  • Caleb Williams folds like a Walmart lawn chair at an Ozarks 4th of July fireworks display...which is mainly just black cats and bottle rockets shot at your cousins. Go 'Merica! 49ers button-fly this game with ease.

• SUN | RAMS @ FALCONS | PICK: RAMS

  • Kirk Cousins will be divinely inspired. Fresh off of the youth caroling and crafts retreat, Cousins will be slinging bombs like a preacher at a Pentecostal revival. Unfortunately, Stafford is the Pontius Pilate of the NFL, passing judgement on other teams without regret. Rams find the promised land in this game.